Notes from the webmaster:

Sorry, Jon, but I have to take issue with this one as well. The Rod Stewart riff between us has always been there, and is well-illustrated by the following review.

Rod Stewart's recording career is impeachable, without question. The sheer volume of records that he's produced should have generated more quality tunes. I can't argue with that. But contrary to Jon's claims in this review, Stewart has done some interesting stuff since "Maggie May" in '71. When I sat Jon down to look closely at Stewart's 1970's output, he pleaded "sloppy research." Jon readily conceded that some good songs came in the late 70's, most notably with 1977's "You're in My Heart," one of the sweetest love songs ever written, with it's humble, poetic amazement of the woman in question. Also noteworthy is 1975 Atlantic Crossing's "I Don't Wanna Talk About It," whose lyrics capture the quiet desperation of rejection.

Although Jon gives a little when I bring up the aforementioned 70's hits, he's less likely to budge on any of Stewart's work in the 80's. Who could blame him? But I must insist that two songs not be lumped in with the dogs of the 80's: First, there's "My Heart Can't Tell You No." Musically, not the greatest song ever written, but you have to give Stewart credibility for the poetry of it, i.e. "I don't want you to come 'round here no more, I beg you for mercy, You don't know how strong my weakness is, Or how much it hurts me…Cause when you said it over with him, I want to believe it's true… So I let you in knowing tomorrow, I'm gonna wake up missing you."

The second 80's Stewart song I'd like to save from the scrapheap is "Some Guys Have All the Luck." A strange pick, for sure, and one that I will never, EVER get Jon to come around on. And for good reason. Jon can't get over the song's glaring lack of credibility, given that it's sung by someone who's had the pleasure of, in fact, having all the luck. If you don't know what I mean, a quick peek into Stewart's super-model dating history will shed some light on the matter. I, however, find the song to be a fun way to feel sorry for yourself. In other words, something with an upbeat tempo during your pity parade.

Good luck with this review, Rod, you need it.

Every Dollar Tells a Story
Rod Stewart hops on the Unplugged bandwagon

Stewart's Unplugged is embarrassingly familiar in format and packaging to Clapton's. Spanning Stewart's entire recording career, Unplugged's fifteen tracks are an expertly produced mixture of hits, covers, and long-lost oldies. From 1970's "Reason to Believe" to the 1991 hit "Have I Told You Lately," many of Stewart's twenty-two releases have been repackaged into the popular unplugged format.

While Stewart cannot be faulted for his business acumen, he can be faulted for his lackluster performance. As easily as Clapton's Unplugged breathes life into old standards, Stewart's sucks it out again. Sadly, the blame for the dullness of Unplugged falls as much on the listeners' shoulders as Stewarts'. The truth is that Stewart hasn't written a truly great song since he wrote "Maggie May" in 1971, and his fine sandpaper voice lost its passionate edge around that same time. Unplugged is just another reminder that Stewart has managed to snow the consumer with a sexy image and a knack for the latest sound.

We can resent Rod Stewart for his lukewarm melodies, but the burden of his radio presence is ours. When Rod discofied himself with "Da Ya Think I'm Sexy," we paid his way to number one. When he turned his back on the vigorous blues rock of the Faces' "Stay With Me" for the forgettable gloss of "Tonight's the Night," "Downtown Train" and "Forever Young," we patted him on the back. Now we have Unplugged to deal with, and as long as we support Stewart's half-hearted efforts with our hard-earned paychecks, he will never have any incentive to give it his best effort and his music will continue to punish us.

Although all of the songs on Unplugged suffer from Stewart's predictable performance, some tracks do stand out. The better a song was originally, the better it fares in the current mix. For a glorious minute or so, "Maggie May" lives up to its former stature before being bogged down with the weight of its years. "Every Picture Tells a Story" is at least adequate, and obscure, bluesier cuts like "Highgate Shuffle" showcase the technical expertise of Stewarts' highly competent backing band, which includes the Rolling Stones' Ronnie Wood, a rock veteran who played with Stewart during his Faces years. The non-hits on Unplugged are often the best. The relaxed, happy "friends jamming" feel of tracks like "Cut Across Shorty" are somehow better than the obligatory quality of hits like "People Get Ready."

Whoever said that "it's easier to criticize than create" must have been trying to defend Rod Stewart. But the fact is that Rod hasn't done much creating. The artistic standard of his early days has been abandoned. In reality, it may not be necessary. If the MTV years have proved anything, it's that big cleavage can always hide small effort. Stewart's music videos may lack substance, but they rarely lack cleavage.

Since both eras have made Rod rich, he has no complaints - but we do. Some of us remember the great ones and long for more. Unplugged...and Seated is perfect background music for dinner parties, but it doesn't do as well when it's the center of attention. Unless we stop footing the bill, Stewart's future CDs will bore us with more of the same.

Jon Reed